Donuts

The First Friday in June is National Donut Day!

The First Friday in June is National Donut Day!

The first Friday in June is

NATIONAL DONUT DAY! 

Please celebrate accordingly – There are rules.

sprinkle donut

Here’s the rules: 

 

Buy your donuts FRESH and EARLY.
Don’t buy crappy donuts.

 

Don’t spend three dollars for ONE donut, not even for one with bacon on it.

 

Vanilla or Lemon custard are superior to Jelly-filled.

 

Glazed donuts are best when hot.

 

Chocolate iced yellow cake donuts are the reason we were given tastebuds.

Purchase more of these than any other variety.

 

Chocolate, Vanilla, and Pink glazed yeast-risen donuts are also popular and delicious.

Sprinkles are not mandatory, but recommended.

 

Powdered Sugar Donuts are the cocaine of donuts, but try not to snort them.

 

For the purposes of National Donut Day, cinnamon rolls/pershings/persians, apple fritters, maple bars, and long johns also qualify as donuts if purchased at the same time as regular donuts. CRONUTS ARE FORBIDDEN!

 

DO NOT donut and drive. If you are going to donut today, Donut Responsibly. PLEASE get a designated coffee drinker.

 

DO NOT eat half of a donut on National Donut Day.

Eat the whole donut or save your deviant donut-eating heresy for another day.

 

The toasted coconut donut is the scariest looking donut, and you will probably not take it. This is fine with me, because I will save it for last and you will be missing out on a one-way ticket to flavor town.

 

The Final Donut Rule: DONUTS RULE!

 

striped donut - national donut day
donuts-rule-001
Posted by vcb, 0 comments

BREAKING: Bacon Twitter Hacked by Donutnonymous

Today is not only NATIONAL DONUT DAY,

but also GUY FAWKES DAY.

It may be just be a coincidence or a well-planned strategic attack,

but one day before the election, presidential candidate and crispy meat strip, C.P. Bacon has had his twitter account (and subsequently also his Facebook account) hacked by the Jelly Donut Hacker Collective known as:

DONUTNONYMOUS

This morning, Donutnonymous made two posts to Bacon’s twitter account @Bacon4Pres.

The most disturbing part of this activity is their uncanny inability to spell their own name.

At this time, it appears that C.P. Bacon has regained control of his social media and there have been no other signs of activity from Donutnonymous, AKA Donutnonmous, AKA Donutronamouse, AKA Donutnonamous, AKA Gooey V. Fawkes AKA Anonymous Jelly Donut.

Virtual Cheeseburger supports the eating of as many donuts as possible today, but advises you to use extreme caution when in the vicinity of any vanilla glazed jelly donut.

REMEMBER TO VOTE ON TUESDAY, NOVEMBER 6TH

Posted by vcb in Bacon, Donuts, Food, Holiday, Humor, Politics, 0 comments
How to pronounce Paczki – The Polish Chicago Mardis Gras Donut!

How to pronounce Paczki – The Polish Chicago Mardis Gras Donut!

Pączki
(actually this is plural; pączek is the singular form)

How do you pronounce the name of this wonderful
jam, jelly, custard or creme filled donut-like pastry?

Here’s the problem:
The word is Polish, and has been Americanized,
so how you pronounce it really depends
on who’s polish grandmother your parents were talking to
when they bastardized the word into Chicago-eze.
So say it how you want, but to me,
it’s a perfect excuse to put Erik Estrada
into a funny photo with a donut.

Poonch+key?
Punch+key?
Ponch plus Key equals how you pronounce the name of the Mardis Gras Jelly Donut

Erik Estrada from CHiPs (aka Ponch) and a Key = how you pronounce Pazcki

PONCH+KEY!

It goes with the photo, so that’s what we’re sticking with.

You know the theme song from that show is now in your head, don’t you?

Posted by vcb in All, Art, CHiPs, Deep Fried, Donut, Donuts, Holiday, Humor, 1 comment